Living the in 21st Century has its advantages and disadvantages. We are progressing as a civilization at monumental speeds and enhancing our overall intellect while doing so. Although we are progressing, are we learning and flourishing in healthy relationships with ourselves and with each other? It does not seem that we are doing so great both individually and as a society with these concepts. Children are shooting each other at alarming rates, people are rallying and protesting while injuring each other during the events, hate crimes are continuing to occur, suicide rates are increasing at an alarming speed, and the list goes on. It is astonishing to think that we have come so far as a society but seem to be going backwards due to not learning or knowing how to appropriately express ourselves while establishing and maintaining healthy relationships. We have to get this right people! The deficits of one generation will continue to the next.
There are so many common challenges that I see both professionally and personally that we commonly struggle with within our lives. And let me say that one of the biggest that I have seen is that having smart phones and other technological communication is only impeding how we communicate with each other. Over 90% of our communication is nonverbal. Now tell me how we are learning or interpreting communication without being able to assess nonverbal communication of each other. We aren’t! That’s why we are having so much difficulty within in our heads about conversations over text. We think, “How did she mean that? What was she really saying?” We are programmed for nonverbal. When we don’t receive it, then our imagination provides it for us and most often it’s not positive. It’s negative mess. MESS MESS EVERYWHERE! I know myself and for me I much prefer to talk to folks face to face. It’s so much energy and hard work yet if I don’t I will be left with thinking, “Did she mean this or this? IDK…” Nonverbal is a must for me or I will get in my head and mess myself up! And if I can’t meet face to face, often I will still have to reach out to them and at least talk to them on the phone to hear the tone in the voice. This is how I have learned to stay healthy. I have too little time to be worrying about what so and so said or didn’t really say. Sigggghhh… my brain…
We have to start learning helpful tools to challenge and grow our inner strengths! When we do this, we start to formulate healthier relationships with ourselves thus with others. You have permission today to put the phone down. Try today to put the technology down for at least 2 hours and spend that precious time with your family. Try to notice how much you pick up on with nonverbal communication. It is wild how much we interpret. A person can say the exact same thing but how their nonverbal is communicates what the person is really saying. Think about how important it is to have those face to face conversations. Love your peeps and communicate it to them today by showing ’em a little.
With Love and Gratitude,